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4 Self-Care Practices Smart Men Use to Build Confidence

Confidence is exponential.

The more confidence you have, the more good things seem to happen to you, which – in turn – develops even more confidence.

A man with robust health has a particular presence that people respond to positively.

There’s science to back that up.

Despite what people might say about their values and priorities, research has confirmed that people visually register others’ health, status, and confidence – and judge them accordingly.

A 2011 research study by Harvard Medical School revealed that people assess others’ competence and trustworthiness in a singular moment, based solely on appearances.

Much of this assessment of confidence occurs below the level of conscious thought.

People make these assessments without realizing that they do it and others do it.

New York’s Center for Talent Innovation also established through research that each of us is instantly evaluated by others – on grooming, posture, confidence, and healthy appearance – whenever we go anywhere.

One of the benefits of adopting improved lifestyle habits is that it inspires other people to notice your strengths while simultaneously motivating them to cultivate their own.

Smart men use self-care habits to build their confidence and succeed in a competitive world.

How to Exude Confidence: 4 Strange Habits of Highly Confident Men

Healthy people appear more capable. Here are four things that mature, stylish men do to appear younger and stronger:

  1. They shave differently.
  2. They have tea daily – because of its longevity effects.
  3. They sculpt their bodies with lean muscle.
  4. They have an actual grooming regimen.

“Enter a room, and it’s already happened. You’ve been evaluated by everyone who saw you, even if all they did was give you a glance. They appraised your clothing and hair style. They noticed the way you carry yourself. They assessed your grooming and accessories. They observed as you greeted someone near the door. Three seconds have passed and you’ve already made an indelible impression.” – Camille Lavington, from You’ve Only Got Three Seconds

Develop these habits yourself and see if they raise your confidence levels. It could make an immediate and positive difference in your own life.

Keep in mind that it’s not always what you’re born with that counts most. It’s what you do with what you have.

Excellent grooming can have an enormous impact on how other people perceive you.

TIP: since people register your posture instantly and unconsciously, it might be worth it for you to upgrade your sitting desk to something more ergonomic.

It’s fairly easy to turn your existing desk into a standing desk, or you can simply get a new standing desk that fits your body perfectly.

Ten years ago, ergonomic standing desks were expensive, but today, a good sit-stand workstation can be quite affordable.

1. Smart Men Shave Better

Though the skin on a man’s face might look okay in the light of the bathroom mirror, get him outdoors or under office lighting – where the majority of other people will actually see him – and the skin reveals a different story.

article by Ryan Raphael and Dane Findley

Bumpy skin is not a confident look on a man.

For many men, their skin has been ravaged by years of poor shaving habits.

Even men who wear beards still often have to shave the areas of their upper cheek and lower neck.

The Art and Science of a Healthy Shave to Build Confidence

smart shaving increases confidence

The number one mistake men make while shaving is shaving in the up-direction along the neck.

Shaving against the direction that hair grows will get you a close shave, yes, but it also negatively impacts your skin over time.

Yes, it looks über-cool when Clark Gable or Cary Grant shave up in the old movies, but it’s not recommended in real life.

Tricks for Getting a Close and Healthy Shave

Here’s the thing: once a man develops a habit of shaving a certain way, it’s almost impossible to get him to improve his regimen. Once the routine has been established into his muscle memory, it will likely remain forever.

However, maintaining good skin is in a man’s best interests. If nothing else, it makes him look less tired at work, giving him a competitive advantage and a look of confidence.


At some point in time, we all have had an ingrown. Ingrown hairs or razor bumps can sometimes go away on their own (hopefully) or can cause a slightly painful feeling in the affected area.

The problem arises when the hair curls back into the skin or the hair is trapped under the dead skin, making it impossible for the hair to grow the way it should.

It can be painful and cause an unsightly appearance in the form of raised skin, a scar, or a dark spot.

Ingrown hairs are similar to pimples as they can become infected or cause an itchy sensation. Usually, men see this around the neck area with multiple tiny bumps.

Although ingrown hairs can be a nuisance, there are simple at-home solutions. Unless laser treatments or depilatory creams completely remove the hair follicle, the problem can show itself repeatedly. Fortunately, at-home exfoliation keeps the skin clear of dead skin, removes oils, and sometimes lifts the hair out of the skin.

Some men can exfoliate 2-3 times a week, but it should be done at least once a week, especially before you shave. Suppose you’d rather make your own; a simple mixture of 1 tbsp brewed green tea, 3 tbsp of sugar, 1 tbsp of honey, & lemon juice can do the trick to create an exfoliating scrub. Try a store-bought facial scrub if a home mixture is not your thing.

Exfoliation before shaving will help by lifting all hairs away from the skin, making it an easier shave.

Warm Compress

Wet a washcloth with hot water, wring out excess water, and apply to the area to be shaven (or better yet, cover the face with a washcloth). This will soften ingrown hairs and bring them closer to the skin’s surface. With an electric razor, this should be done after shaving.

I also like Ren Tamanu High Glide Shaving Oil, a pre-treatment (can be applied 10 minutes or more before shaving).  It costs a bit more upfront, but on the bright side, a container lasts a very long time as just a few concentrated drops are needed per shave.

mature athlete over fifty during sprints workout
My new coursebook is designed for the sole purpose of helping you get healthier quickly. It’s a step-by-step guide for returning to fantastic shape, presented in a strategic sequence. You’ll learn exactly how to eat after the age of 50. Your clothes will fit you better. You’ll feel trim and athletic. Even your skin will improve. Click-through for details.

Rethink “Close”

Shaving can make you look younger, and many men prefer a clean shave. Others like the look of facial hair.

Men who keep facial hair at a certain length will be less likely to have a problem with ingrown hair.

Those of us who enjoy the feel and look of a clean shave have a few options: resist a close shave by leaving a shadow/stubble; shave in the direction the hair is growing with as few strokes as possible to prevent the hairs from slipping back into the skin and to prevent irritation.

Electric razors can also help since they do not give as close a shave as razors (or try using a single-blade razor since multiple blades can cause more irritation to the skin).

Remember, bumpy skin lessens confidence, so only shave as close as you need to and no closer.

men confidence


Tweezers can be useful in removing the tip of hair piercing back into the skin.

This process is time-consuming and should be done carefully so as not to cause a break in the skin or (if you can) try not to remove the hair completely. Removing the hair completely could result in the hair follicle growing deeper than before, making it more of a nuisance to remove later.

Using a small magnifying mirror under good lighting will help in the process. Sterilizing the tweezer with rubbing alcohol is recommended to prevent infections.

handsome older man applying moisturizer under his eyes


Moisturizing is among the most important activities you can do for your skin. Shaving can not only cause ingrown hairs but also strips the skin of moisture in the process.

Find the right moisturizer that suits your skin:

  • Moisturizers with royal jelly are highly recommended. Royal jelly helps with skin renewal.
  • Avocado is also a good source of fatty acids and contains humectants (chemicals that attract and hold water, forming a barrier that helps keep in moisture).
  • Speaking of avocados, one of the most effective ways to improve your skin is to improve your diet. Skin is often the first place to see a healthy lifestyle’s positive visual impact.

Remember, the big idea behind smarter shaving for men is that it will help you look less tired. A tired face does not evoke confidence. On the other hand, a fresh, energized face says, “Confidence.”

2. Smart Men Imbibe Daily Tea

Many men are fiercely protective of their coffee-drinking habits.

Psychologists tell us that one clue toward a possible addiction can be found within the answer to this question: “Can I imagine my life without it?”

Suppose you absolutely cannot imagine your life without something. If that something isn’t within Maslow’s Hierarchy Of Needs – it might be a clue to a possible addictive behavior, including coffee.

Fortunately, a man doesn’t have to be either a tea drinker or a coffee drinker. He can be both.

If you were to replace one of your daily cups of coffee with a cup of tea, what kind of health benefits might occur in the long term?

smart men develop confidence

Science reveals that green tea can be a healing elixir that promotes longevity.

Among the healthiest and longest-living humans on the planet, the Okinawans in Japan drink jasmine green tea throughout the day. Reportedly loaded with tumor-reducing properties (see sources below this article) and polyphenols, green tea is a cherished daily ritual for millions of people around the planet.

What are the Benefits of Green Tea?

My medical doctor advised me to keep drinking green tea each day but to limit it to one cup in the morning and to add nettle tea to my daily tea drinking as well.

Sometimes, estrogen levels get too high in men over the age of 50. My doctor explained that too much green tea in men after age 40 can sometimes activate the aromatase enzyme in fat cells that converts the body’s naturally produced testosterone into estrogen. At the same time, nettle can provide a unique mechanism for increasing testosterone levels. So, I still drink green tea daily to obtain its health benefits, but I don’t go overboard, and I also have Nettle tea daily. I like the taste nettle adds to my brew – slight flavor undernotes of tobacco and hay, which I find appealing.

More recently, the first thing I drink in the morning when I wake up (after using a tongue-scraper and gargling) is a tall glass of water. After that, I have a cup of a customized tea brew I make from green, ginger, and nettle teas. Later, I also have a cup of black tea. And after lunch, I have a small cup of coffee when I start to drag.

What Does Green Tea Do?

Green Tea has many benefits.

It’s high in epigallocatechin gallate (EGCG), a powerful antioxidant.

Studies have shown that this antioxidant can act as a fighter against cancer and improve the ratio of LDL cholesterol to HDL cholesterol while reducing the formation of blood clots.

Benefits of drinking green tea:

green tea boosts confidence
  • antioxidants
  • anti-cancer properties
  • boost immune system
  • increase alertness
  • help with weight loss by boosting the metabolism
  • increase the levels of good cholesterol

Does Green Tea Contain Caffeine?

In a serving size of 8 ounces, green tea contains approximately 32 mg of caffeine (sometimes less, but rarely over 40 mg). A cup of coffee can have up to 200 mg! Many people find that the caffeine in green tea provides just the right amount of “lift” and mood enhancement, without any of the crash-and-burn sometimes associated with coffee drinking.

Homemade Green Tea Foot Bath Helps Your Feet Feel New Again

You might be surprised to learn that green tea has many topical benefits, too:

  • anti-aging
  • help against psoriasis
  • wound healing
  • reduce sun damage
  • reduce odor
  • detoxifying
  • anti-fungal/antibacterial
  • reduce eye strain (using cooled tea bags over closed eyelids)
  • helps repair the outer layer (epidermis) of the skin

The feet are the most-used body part, especially for active people. The feet can become easily stressed and can be overlooked when providing comfort. Men, especially, tend to let their foot care go untended.

Let’s face it, many dudes have scaly, ugly feet.

When time permits, I’ll indulge in a green tea foot bath while watching television. What started as a green tea-only foot bath has now grown with the addition of essential oils. There are various ways to create a foot bath. Some have sea salt in the mix. Sea salt helps soften the skin.

Here’s what you’ll need:

  • spa foot bath (or a big basin)
  • green tea (loose or tea bags)
  • essential oil of choice
  • moisturizer
  • towel
  • callus remover (optional).
green tea foot bath

A green tea foot bath can help soothe the skin.

Brew green tea for 15 minutes (1 teaspoon to each cup) in hot water; you can boil water in a pot and let the tea steep for easier use. Add 2-4 drops of essential oil into the spa foot bath and mix in the green tea. Once cool enough, soak your feet in water for 15 to 20 minutes. Remove feet, rinse in warm water, dry, and moisturize. As an option, socks can hold the moisture while relaxing (ensure feet are completely dry).

Another tip is the use of tea tree or peppermint oil or both. Tea tree is known for its anti-fungal benefits, while peppermint can be used for aching feet. A callus remover can remove dead skin from below the feet before using a moisturizer. Trim your nails while you’re at it. If you’re not a home-grooming type of fellow, get a professional pedicure once a month.

It helps build confidence when all your parts are healthy, clean, and presentable. Even the parts that people don’t always see. You’ll know. And that’s what matters.

3. Smart Men Add Lean Muscle Tissue to Develop More Confidence

Good bearing and carriage indicate positive self-worth.

Becoming physically stronger subsequently helps a person gain emotional confidence, too:

  • What would happen if you were to become more fit than you are right now? Would the impact be positive or negative?
  • Would more muscle help you to exude an image of strength?

Of course, you might be too busy working to make it to the gym daily. Thanks to the newest technology, it’s now possible to get extremely fit without leaving home.

With the emerging trend of the exergame – computer programs that make a game out of exercise – you can improve your physical fitness (while having fun …and without going to a crowded gym).

Use exergames to build confidence.

better fitness exergames

It doesn’t have to be a game, strictly speaking. You can get a fantastic workout DVD (my personal favorites include kettlebell, yoga, and pilates mat workouts), or you can use one of the many excellent exercise digital-streaming services available (such as Daily Burn).  However, if you already own a game counsel, you might as well try playing a fitness game, too.

Best Fitness Games to Get Fit at Home

Human brains have evolved over millennia to respond to certain visual cues in others.

This is not about politics; it’s about biology.

Humans respond well to men who appear strong, capable, fresh-faced, and energetic.

When you exude these qualities of confidence visually, it then inspires others to believe you can be relied upon.

Of course, many men – as much as they want to appear flexible and fit – are too busy to make it to the gym daily. This is when exergames can be very convenient.

Following are some helpful reviews of the best fitness computer games available on the market.

Exergaming Turns Your Home into an Instant Gym

Any room in your home can be made into a gym instantly. A patio, a living room, a bedroom – all you need is enough room to move, a video game console, and an exergame title that you enjoy.

Three currently popular video game consoles are Wii, Kinect (Xbox), and PlayStation Move.

In 2007, Wii Fit was the breakout hit in the exergaming market – creating an entire craze and challenging the stereotype of the couch-potato video gamer who sits for 7-hour stretches, chomping on Flamin’ Hot Fritos Corn Chips and gulping Mountain Dew by the gallon.

Since then, the introduction of Kinect (Xbox 360) and Move (PlayStation 3) has opened the arena for exergames.

PlayStation 3 works similarly to the Wii’s motion control (think of it as Wii 2.0.)

On the other hand, Kinect works with no controllers because you are the controller.

How to Use Exergames to Build Confidence

Today, there are many exergame titles to choose from (for each gaming console brand) that will help you to get into shape – not only by providing exercise directly through a set routine but also by providing a way to keep the body moving through motion gaming.

The question has always been, “are they effective?”

Exergames can be highly effective if one is motivated enough to be consistent and have a goal. There are people who have lost over 100 pounds of fat and added muscle tone using exergames.

develop lean muscle for confidence

For each great success, there are also a few who give up after a few weeks.

Usually, those who give up do so because they started without a fitness fat-loss plan, to begin with. 

It’s helpful to have an end goal in mind while at the same time keeping expectations realistic.

In my opinion, fitness computer games should be considered a companion to regular exercise — another tool in the exercise toolbox

In particular, exergaming is great for those days when you cannot do your normal routine, as a way to keep the body moving during bad weather, or as a way to add to a bit of variety and to keep from getting bored.

Sports and Motion Games for Better Confidence – Review Update

These game reviews reveal the best fitness video computer games to help you get fit at home. Included are exergames currently available for each of the three popular consoles.

Motion games are a sub-genre of fitness computer game titles. They provide a fun way of keeping the body moving, with most of the exercise provided with dance games like Black Eyed Peas Experience and Just Dance.


  • Wii Fit/Plus
  • EA Sports Active 2: More Workouts
  • EA Sports NFL Training Camp
  • Zumba Fitness 1 & 2
  • Punch Out
  • Wii Ski & Snowboard
  • Michael Jackson The Experience
  • Just Dance (Series)

Kinect (Xbox):

  • Your Shape Fitness Evolved
  • Nike+ Kinect Training
  • The Biggest Loser Ultimate Workout
  • UFC Trainer
  • Kinect Adventures
  • Black Eyed Peas Experience
  • Just Dance 4
  • Dance Central (Series)

PlayStation Move:

  • Dance Dance Revolution
  • Get Fit with Mel B
  • Adidas miCoach
  • Zumba Fitness
  • Sports Champions (series)
  • Medieval Moves: Deadmund’s Quest
  • Grand Slam Tennis 2
  • Just Dance (Series)

The motion games require additional hardware if you do not already own them (except for the Wii, which comes with motion games right out the box, and the games are enhanced using the Wii Fit Balance Board).

The downside to these games is the requirement for real estate. While many games can function with 7 feet of free space for basic exercises such as pushups and sit-ups, some of the games require 10 feet of free space. Otherwise, some side-to-side movements and jumps might be tricky to pull off.

Motion games have been around on major consoles for the past nine years and have proved to be an effective way to keep us moving – especially on time-limited days when we’re unable to get to the gym.

If you were to become stronger and more flexible one year from now, would that increase your confidence or lessen it?

Exercise is, and always will be, one of the most important aspects of the longevity lifestyle.

If you want to live a long time, become increasingly healthy, and live free of disease, then you must move your body regularly.

Overall, exergames and motion games offer an unquestionable advantage in improving your health because they give you more exercise options and help to keep your workouts interesting and fun.

mature, fit man and woman gardening

4. Men with Confidence Take Care of Their Skin

I first became intrigued by essential oils when I discovered peppermint oil in place of gum.

I dislike chewing gum – especially the kind with artificial sweeteners – but even though some consider gum-chewing an unattractive habit, it’s a great way to clean your teeth and freshen your breath quickly – especially when you’re in your car driving from one appointment to another.

My naturopath had suggested that instead of chewing gum, I mix some peppermint oil with olive oil and avocado oil and put the mixture into a little spray bottle.

I was stunned to discover that this is the most refreshing and effective way to freshen my mouth quickly. It tastes great and has a zing that makes me feel alert and puts me in a brighter mood.

Essential Oils Can Help You Have a Better Day

Among my favorite oils are scents from my favorite foods – lime, cardamom, mint, and vanilla. I’m also partial to frankincense, vetiver, angelic flower, and – as an undernote – patchouli.

Essential oils smell confidence

What are Essential Oils?

Essential oils are best known for their roles in aromatherapy, their scent can leave one’s mind in a more relaxed state – or some cases, they are used to invigorate one’s senses.

Essential oils are used in everyday products: lotions, shampoo, facial scrubs, and cleaning products; the oil is used as an aromatic or for its chemical properties.

Essential oils have been dated back to Egyptian times for medical and cosmetic purposes. French scientist Rene Gattefosse accidentally discovered the healing benefits of lavender oil when he accidentally burnt his hand.

The chemical properties of essential oils differ. Menthol is present in peppermint oil, which relieves pain in aching muscles, while grapefruit oil mixed with a carrier oil (coconut, olive, or sesame oil) provides powerful antioxidants to the skin, helping it retain its youthful appearance.

“Synergy blends” can be created to enhance one’s mood – a grapefruit/peppermint combination, in the form of an aromatherapy mist, can revitalize, for example.

Breathing with Confidence: Purify Your Indoor Air

Essential oils can be used within candles or as a replacement for air fresheners: peppermint, eucalyptus, and lavender oil can be mixed with purified water to create a spritz.

Eucalyptus oil is an antiseptic and deodorant by nature; it eliminates odor in the air while peppermint leaves a refreshing feeling, lavender for its relaxing properties (peppermint and lavender mixed can also be used as a natural bug repellent).

Enhance Your Confidence and Overall Mood

Essential oils are an effective mood enhancer. Like using oil as a Febreze substitute, I’ll keep several bottles around the house with different oil mixtures. There’s even one in my gym bag; peppermint/grapefruit/vanilla, which I use before and after a workout to keep motivated.

Nourish Your Skin with Essential Oils

Essential oils are unquestionably good for skin care.

Lavender oil is best used to help heal cuts and bruises, while tea tree oil (antifungal) can be used to treat athlete’s foot. Vanilla oil can even be a good aphrodisiac and mixed with coconut oil (carrier oil) for massages.

Eucalyptus oil, for example, can be used for muscle pain and skincare (though the scent can be overpowering if used in excess).

I tend to favor citrus oils, and I usually use coconut oil as my preferred “carrier oil.” Carrier oil is the oil you mix/dilute with the stronger oil to help make it more palatable and deliverable.

The first thing other people notice about you is your face. With that in mind, it’s possible that having great skin will significantly impact others’ opinions of you – including how they perceive your confidence.

Healthy men appear brighter to others and seem to exude more confidence.

What can you do to develop your inner strength to present yourself as highly skilled and dependable to others?

Additional Sources on Building Confidence:

“7 ways your boss is judging your appearance and confidence” ~ http://www.forbes.com/sites/jennagoudreau/2012/11/30/the-seven-ways-your-boss-is-judging-your-appearance/#3311de825500

“Research discovers that green tea reduces inflammation and could inhibit prostate cancer tumor growth” ~ https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2012/10/121018121956.htm

“If I look happy, healthy and productive, subconsciously it has an impact.” ~ http://www.nytimes.com/1989/01/18/garden/making-over-an-image-with-an-expert-s-help.html?pagewanted=all

“Aura of Respect (Appearances Matter) ~ http://www.wsj.com/articles/SB124614922740765101

“You’ve only got three seconds to demonstrate confidence” ~ https://www.amazon.com/Youve-Got-Only-Three-Seconds/dp/0385484550

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